What to Do If a Parent Violates Parenting Plan

Understanding Parenting Plans and Custody Orders

What is the difference between parenting plans and custody orders? Although both govern the legal care of a child, the court establishes one, and the other is an agreement between parents. A custody order establishes legal and physical custody, while Washington parenting plans detail the daily habits of parenting, which include schedules, decision-making, care, and other parenting responsibilities.

What Is a Parenting Plan?

Parenting plans are voluntary written agreements between parents. They also include grandparents and other guardians. This plan details practical issues related to caring for children, including education, living arrangements, finances, and healthcare. The parenting plan should assist parents when they come across a disagreement by offering amicable, pre-decided, informal guidelines.

Legal Importance of Court-Approved Parenting Plans

Parenting agreements can help guide a court toward certain outcomes. Though the court will thoroughly review facts and make their decision based on a child’s best interests, court-approved parenting plans can be established to ensure that the parents follow the intentions of the court.

The court’s custody determination can be paired with a court parenting plan. It will address legal and physical custody, and a court may outline everything from schooling to discipline. If the parents cannot agree, the court-approved parenting plan will legally bind them to sharing their children’s time and making decisions about the child’s well-being. The court will always put the child first and provide a clear framework to reduce conflict and enforce stability.

What Constitutes a Violation of a Parenting Plan?

Define what actions or behaviors qualify as a violation of a parenting plan, such as denying visitation, failing to follow the agreed schedule, or making unilateral decisions without consent.

Common Violations

Common parenting plan violations include:

  • Missing an appointed drop-off or pick-up
  • Arriving late or outside of schedule
  • Extending parenting time without permission
  • Refusing parenting time
  • Failing to pay child support
  • Exposing children to dangerous situations
  • Preventing communication with the other parent
  • Relocation without approval
  • Preventing the child from attending obligations
  • Failing to obtain the other parent’s consent for decisions

Minor vs. Major Violations

Minor violations (such as arriving late, not following the parenting plan, not checking in with the other parent) can be frustrating and strain the relationship between ex-spouses, but major violations (sudden relocation, refusing to pay child support, preventing communication) can be serious and dangerous.

When one parent violates the parenting plan, it’s important to document the individual violations. Record them on a list with dates and times, and take note of withheld parenting time, missed schedules, and other violations. You can also keep copies of messages from the other parent.

Consider mediation to resolve these issues, but know that you can speak with an attorney about legal action if you believe the other parent is continuously and willfully going against the parenting plan. Reach out to a family law attorney to discuss your legal options.

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Types of Parenting Plan Violations

Missing Scheduled Visitation

When a parent fails to show up for pick-ups or drop-offs, repeatedly arrives late, or arrives earlier than necessary in a repeated display of disrupting the other parent’s time and schedule, this can disrupt routines and cause issues.

Denying the Other Parent’s Visitation

One parent may defy or refuse court-ordered visits, either in a form of retaliation or as an emotional response. This can come in the form of repeatedly “forgetting” visitation times, or causing issues to obscure their visitations.

Changing the Child’s Residence Without Approval

Relocations, whether temporary or permanent, with the court’s permission or the other parent’s knowledge, can lead to direct legal action. Moving is a big event in a child’s life, and you need an established reason, such as a new job, presented to the court.

Blocking Communication With the Child

The child should never be prevented from communicating with the other parent willfully. By ignoring calls and texts, taking away their phone, or doing anything else to obfuscate their lines of communication if the parent tries to reach the other child (within reason) can be a legal matter.

Ignoring Decision-Making Agreements

Major choices should always be made with the knowledge and permission of the other parent. Education, religion, and healthcare decisions must be made by consulting the other parent and working out the decisions together.

What to Do If the Other Parent Violates the Parenting Plan

When the other parent continuously and willfully violates the parenting plan, it’s time to take action. The small steps are important, such as documenting each incident, recording times and dates, and repeatedly attempting communication before seeking legal remedies.

Document the Violation

Keeping detailed records is important when addressing parenting violations. You want to keep a log of incidents using dates, times, and descriptions. Save texts, videos, communications, and emails. The more you document, the easier it will be to prove wrongdoing if legal action is necessary.

Attempt to Resolve Informally

You can reach out to the other parent and resolve the issue without escalation through communication. Attempt to calmly discuss the violations, seeking a bridge of perspectives or a mutually agreeable solution. Even if this doesn’t work, this step can prevent misunderstandings.

Contact a Family Law Attorney

Going against the parenting plan can look like many things. Repeated violations, unsuccessful mediation attempts, endangerment, parental neglect, or retaliation against the other parent can be difficult to deal with. When violations become a pattern, you should retain legal counsel. Washington courts take parental non-compliance seriously, and the judge may even adjust custody agreements or enforce compliance.

File a Motion for Contempt in Court

In Washington State, if the other parent is intentionally not following the parenting plan and/or operating in bad faith, you can file a contempt action. Contempt is when you ask the judge to find the parent in violation of the court order, with proceedings that punish the other parent or coerce them to follow the plan.

What Is a  Contempt Motion?

When the other parent violates a court order, you can file a motion with the judge. The judge will set a hearing date or order the parents to attend mediation.

Possible Court Outcomes

The judge may make additional terms and conditions, require family counseling, hold the other parent accountable or find them in contempt, or schedule a hearing to modify the existing parenting order concerning custody and visitations.

Legal Remedies and Enforcement Options

There are consequences of not following the parenting plan. When your parenting plan is violated, you may want to seek legal action. Filing a motion for contempt, requesting makeup parenting time, or modifying the parenting plan can alleviate the issues caused by the other parent. How do courts enforce these orders, and what are the potential consequences for noncompliance?

Make-Up Parenting Time

The judge may order “make-up” parenting time for what was lost, or otherwise alter the parenting plan by adding more details and provisions.

Modification of Parenting Plan

The parenting plan may be altered, such as specific days and times changing, additional terms and conditions that govern each parent, or order the one who violated the parenting plan to lose some aspect of visitation or custody. Parenting plan modification is sometimes a necessary step.

Sanctions and Penalties

The violator may have to pay money to the court, or the judge may order that one or both parties attend counseling, mediation, or parental education classes. The judge may award attorney fees and court costs to the other party.

Involving Law Enforcement

The judge may involve law enforcement and otherwise suspend, change, or end spousal/child support. They can schedule a hearing to change custody of the child, and may end visitation rights for the violating parent.

How to Prevent Future Violations

There are a few practical strategies that may prevent future parenting plan violations. Maintaining clear communication, using scheduling apps, and setting unambiguous terms in the plan could clear up issues and frustrations. What to do if a parent violates the parenting plan.

Strengthening the Parenting Plan

The parenting plan may need to be changed and updated over time. In Washington State, the plan can be modified when changes arise, such as circumstances that affect the child’s best interests.

As your child grows, you may need to strengthen the parenting plan with regular check-ins that govern shifting school schedules or part-time jobs. Relocation, new jobs, and other changes could make the existing parenting plan obsolete in some ways, and could require fair solutions through mediation.

Use of Co-Parenting Tools and Apps

Co-parenting therapists and counselors can help you through challenges and open the lines of communication, but when this isn’t possible with your ex-spouse, you might consider modern co-parenting tools and apps that can enforce scheduling.

Consistent Communication and Mediation

Regularly connecting with the other parent can provide insight into changing situations. Your ex-spouse may need emotional support, financial support, or therapy, and their sudden erratic decision-making could be a reflection of unknown woes. Consistent communication and mediation could help resolve issues.

How a Washington State Family Lawyer Can Help

Skyview Law LLC has been helping clients in Eastern Washington and the Tri-Cities area for over ten years. As members of the community ourselves, our small but hard-working team is here to advocate for you.

With over a decade of experience successfully helping clients mediate resolutions with ex-spouses and former partners, we place honesty and trustworthiness at the forefront of every interaction by helping Washington families reach the legal outcomes they deserve.

Our client-centered approach is personalized, and it all begins with a Free consultation. Don’t let a complex legal process cause additional issues between you and your co-parent. Let us resolve parenting plan and custody issues while protecting you and your family.

FAQs About Parenting Plan Violations

What can I do if my ex won’t follow the parenting plan?

Understand the violation, document the incident, try to communicate with the violating parent, consider taking legal action, and seek a family law attorney who can provide you with answers and relief.

How to Deal With an Ex Who’s Withholding Child Visitation

If you don’t live with your child and your ex is withholding your visitation rights (and it’s established that you don’t pose some danger to your child), you need to get a court order to reinforce your visitation rights. You can file a contempt charge or seek legal counsel to enforce your visitation rights.

What are the Requirements & Procedure for Contempt?

The initiating party needs enough evidence to hold the other in contempt. They must show that the offending party has directly violated the parenting plan or has failed to comply with a court order. Then they must show that the offending party’s failure was willful, through evidence including text messages, emails, recordings, and other documents. 

After contempt is initiated, the other party has 30 days to respond to the motion before a contempt hearing is set. During the hearing, the defendant must prove that there was no failure to comply with court orders. If they can’t and are found in contempt, they could suffer court-ordered punishments including wage garnishment, sanctions, or jail time.

Contact Skyview Law for Parenting Plan Violations

Skyview Law is on your side. When one parent continually violates a parenting plan, it can be frustrating, demoralizing, and life-altering. Skyview Law helps clients prepare by providing support, handling paperwork, and navigating challenging legal scenarios. With years of experience helping families in Washington, we are the competent legal aid that can alter the tide and increase your chances of a positive outcome.

Schedule a Free Consultation today. Skyview Law’s experience in family law and custody matters can considerably improve your situation, whether you need to alter your parenting plan, seek past due custody payments, or file for contempt. Don’t leave things up to chance when dealing with an uncooperative former partner. Put your children and family first with Skyview Law.

Picture of JARROD HAYS

JARROD HAYS

Jarrod Hays is the founder of Skyview Law. He is licensed to practice law in Washington State and the Western District of Washington State Federal Court.

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